A child’s world shattered many years ago. Being carefree and joyous, the child did not yearn for much in the childhood years. The family structure looks normal with grandparent, uncles, parents and lastly a sibling. But things changed when the child’s family severe ties with the grandparent side. Things that were never talked about surfaced such as the grandparent is just a foster parent of the child’ father. The child never have a grandparent or uncle that truly belongs to the child. Still the child was not dismay with the new life as the child still has parents and sibling. But the child knew that something will be gone and lost, even though the world is still beautiful something would just change. The family is truly independent now, even though it had always been so, without any linkages to any roots or relatives. Parents work as hard as always, child does not ask for anything more than what was available as those would be luxury.

All the child yearn for is to grow up fast to work and support the parents. It was a simple dream, to work and provide for the family, eating out whenever possible with the family, as the father usually need to work even in the weekends. Helping to reduce the burden of the parents. The child had a simple mind, a simple aim but the child ‘s view of the world changes and can never be simple as before. Comparison among peers occur, yet the child does not ask for more as the child already had a lot more than anyone else and the child knew somethings were just out of reach. But life would turn out better when the child grew up and work. The child studied just hoping that study would help the family in the future as study can secure a better paying job, unlike the blue collar job of the father that robbed the family of weekend time together.

During the time when peers were bother over looks, enjoyment, branded goods or boy girl relationship. The child had only a broad aim in mind, to study and get through to the next level. Many things were forgone. Parents did argue as the father is useless other than hardworking and honest. The family knew that the father is hardworking thus his mistakes, weakness or any flaws were always forgiven as he was hardworking and never had any bad habits and he truly provides for the family to his utmost ability. The child learn skills to cover the father’s weakness, whatever the father cannot do well. The child tried to learn and improve in order to take over the father’s duty so that the parents have less things to quarrel about. Never did the child knew that the effort to maintain or improve the family amount to nothing in the very end.

Even though the child never bow down to destiny or obstacle in the journey of growing up in order to fulfill a simple wish, the child never knew that a betrayal or wrongdoing by the very dear person once again shatter a simple dream that once belong to the child. The father is still in contact with the family that once had driven the child’s family away. The father is still in contact with the family that had never once lend a helping hand when the child’s family is suffering. The father had the audacity to steal from the family, claiming that boss had deducted his pay in order to give the family which had once forgone the child’ family. The child believe every word of the honest father and believe that the boss really deduct the pay and the child scrimp and save and never once ask for more, believing that is would burden the family. The child believe that the father work seven days a week without off to provide for the family, instead the father rather used his off day to visit the family who once chose to drive him away than spending the time with his family. The child did everything within means to help the family and never ask for more. However, the father betrayed the effort of the child and shatter the effort of the child to achieve a simple dream that the child once had.

A simple dream and it was simply shattered. Never mind that, the child will fabricate another new dream in another day once again. But it would still be a simple one.

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Any second thought?

I did a test on the supposed major that I could have taken in university. I really did not expect this funny outcome. I did not know why, hahaha

You scored as HR/BusinessManagement. You should strongly consider majoring (or minoring) in Human Resources Management or Business Management, or related majors (e.g., Entrepreneurship, Hospitality, International Business, Leadership, Public Administration, Industrial-Organizational (I-O) Psychology).
It is possible that the best major for you is your 2nd, 3rd, or even 5th listed category, so be sure to consider ALL majors in your OTHER high scoring categories (below). You may score high in a category you didnt think you would–it is possible that a great major for you is something you once dismissed as not for you. The right major for you will be something 1) you love and enjoy and 2) are really great at it.

Consider adding a minor or double majoring to make yourself standout and to combine your interests. Excellent minors for HR/Business majors include: Psychology, Sociology, or other areas of business like Economics, Finance, or Marketing. Please post your results in your myspace/blog/journal.

HR/BusinessManagement
 
100%
Biology/Chemistry/Geology
 
88%
English/Journalism/Comm
 
81%
Education/Counseling
 
81%
History/Anthropology/LiberalArts
 
81%
Psychology/Sociology
 
75%
PoliticalScience/Philosophy
 
75%
French/Spanish/OtherLanguage
 
69%
Physics/Engineering/Computer
 
63%
Nursing/AthleticTraining/Health
 
56%
Accounting/Finance/Marketing
 
56%
Religion/Theology
 
38%
Visual&PerformingArts
 
38%
Mathematics/Statistics
 
31%

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忘记如果,所有的如果都不是实质的。只有眼前的才是真实的。环境与际遇的不同,命运的玩弄造就了相异的思维,所以人可以回忆,反思但不要质疑当初的抉择。

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View from a Bus

Travelling to school on a bus is always eventful. I tend to look around whenever I am not dozing off. Today, I saw a family of three; a mother, a big brother and a sister. It was early in the morning when the mother and her kids are preparing to cross a two lane road. The big brother crossed first followed by the sister. After reaching the bus stop, the sibling sat quite far apart and no apparent communication is observed. The working mother turned her back and climbed the stairs towards the carpark once the little girl crossed the road without checking that the little girl reach the bus stop and settled comfortably.  Even though the road is void of traffic other than the bus, the mother should in the very least ensure that the siblings watched each others. I wonder if the mother observed the cute pair of siblings behaving as if they are strangers. Many a times the younger siblings are forgotten by their elder siblings in a spur of moment.

Is our inculcating of independence a form of escapism? Do we say that our kids are independent and so we left them to be what they are and accept that they can decide for themselves. Maybe cultivating independence does enables us to shed some emotional burden on our side and reduce the needs or reliance of the children.

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Not In Sync

Many times, this feeling came upon me. Especially in crowded area such as the passage connecting NEL to the Ease West line at Outram MRT. I would be swarming around, following the general trend of the main stream people.

Either I cannot keep up with the pace of the people or my pace tend to be much faster than others during the walk from one end to the other end. Many times, I need to shift my steps and end up walking with awkard pace in order not to bum into people, be it uncles, aunties, young man or ladies. I observe myself whenever I am walking by myself. I have the tendency to speed up in crowded area. In less crowded area, I will be slower than others as I take my time to dilly dally and look at my surroundings, be it the sky, the buildings or the people.

I cannot synchronize with the others, i need to remind myself conciously to be in sync. Is it my fault? No, definitely not. Am i defensive here? I do not know. I will do whatever my mind says, be it right or wrong.

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‘short fuse’ indeed

Busy doing some assignment when I just got a bit tired and short fused, decided to try something and post the excerpt from the test which has some sense of truth.

You are seeking an affectionate relationship, offering fulfilment and happiness. You are capable of powerful emotional enthusiasm. Deep down, you are a kind loving person, always helpful and willing to adapt yourself if necessary to realise the bond of affection that you desire. But you need the same consideration and understanding from others and it is this need that will sometimes hold you back… so let go, trust and you may pleasantly surprised at what happens.

You are a leader and possibly at this time in a position of authority, but you are experiencing problems. You are not quite sure how to handle the present situation.

Loneliness is soul destroying and at this time you feel lost and lonely, perhaps it is because you feel so frustrated that you are prepared to go out of your way to become emotionally involved with someone who could accept you for what you are. Many people will consider you egotistical,egocentric, antagonistic and full of your own self importance.On the surface you could well give this impression and perhaps the reason for this complacent attitude is because at times you are ‘short fuse’ and quick to take offence, although it must be said, you can control your pent-up up emotion and thus avoid open conflict.

Presently, you are experiencing stress because of restriction on your independence. You need and seek respect from other people and it is essential that they appreciate you for yourself and not for what they would like you to be. You have your own beliefs and convictions and you would like to be respected for them. You are anxious to avail yourself of every opportunity that may come your way but nevertheless, come what may, you have the need to control your own destiny without imposed limitations or restrictions.

You wish to be left in peace… no more conflict and no more differences of opinion. In fact you just don’t want to be involved in arguments of any shape or form. All you want is for ‘them’ to get on with it – and to leave you alone.

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Seeing is Believing, You got to Believe for you to see

Suffered from sudden bout of fever and sore throat on Saturday. I am still not feeling good right now. However, I did enjoy my Sunday with my family. I was watching “Santa Clause 2” on Channel 5 with my sister and one of the dialogue gave me a deep impression. I make a bit of change and it is my title “Seeing is Believing, You got to Believe for you to see”.

It is quite true that people tend to believe what they see with their own eyes. However, one never realize that what we see is only one facet of the truth or we only look at things from one angle and the angle that we look at things are affected by our upbringing and the general societal norm. For example, during a conversation with my Primary 4 sister she commented that nurses are all female. I asked how did she observe that. She replied that it is from the TV shows. People tend to forget that what we see on TV is affected by the camera man’s angle of view and that camera angle are restricted. Thus we can only see or watch from one angle. Yet we readily accept what we saw as the one and only universal truth.

I always try to remind myself to shift my paradigm regularly, something I learnt back in secondary. If we are used to a fixed angle or frequency, due to human nature we will be contended with what we get. Once we get contended, we will not questioned or be critical with the information we received. Even though I am the type who believe what I see, I tend to believe only a certain portion . Until I get a fuller picture or I get more source of information then I will accept the full share of information.

Sometimes, we got to believe in something before we see. Our belief will guide us to see what we see. For example, if we believe in kindness we will see kindness in our daily life. A thoughtful act by stranger can be an act of kindness. However, if we do not believe in kindness we will think twice before accepting any kind or helpful act of others. We will be measuring or thinking why the person do that, does he/she has anything to gain from doing that. When we do not believe in kindness or helpfulness, everything will only be reduced to petty gain or losses. That is a very pathetic way to live, when we measure everything in gain or losses.

I believe what I see, yet I got to be critical with what I see. I believe thus I see what I see.

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